that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
We had to coat check the pizza.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
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