I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
Life is so much better after having sex.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
Randomize
