Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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