there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
