You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
