We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Randomize