ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize