when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
Why is the toilet broken? Why did I wake up naked in the shower, hugging a bath mat? WHY IS THE TOILET BROKEN?
Is it just clogged or something?
No! There are actual chunks of toilet on the floor.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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