: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
Randomize
