he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
Randomize
