how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
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