I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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