he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize
