Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
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