Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Randomize
