We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
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