operation harelip BJ is a go
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
