Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
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