1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
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