I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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