let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize
