i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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