i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
Randomize
