p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
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