best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Randomize