hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
Randomize
