so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
Randomize
