btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
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