we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
