She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
