We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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