scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
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