I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Randomize
