Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Randomize
