are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
Randomize
