It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
