she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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