someone get that fucking seahorse.
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
meet me or not, i'm out of control
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize
