I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
Omg I joined a choir last night...
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize