He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
Randomize
