u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
