I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
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