oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize
