I wannas sexs uuuuu
I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Randomize
