Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
