he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
