I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
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