Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
Randomize
