Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
Randomize
