I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
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