week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
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